Do you ever decide to not go going out because you “have no friends” or can’t find the energy to leave the house?
Based on my personal experiences, if that’s how you tend to spend a Friday night, you’re doing it all wrong.
College life isn’t easy. The trick is finding a balance.
My first year, I spent all my free time seeing friends back home but felt uncomfortable meeting anyone new.
Last year, I spent the year coming up with every possible excuse not to go out. The weather was bad, I was tired, I had work to do.
Living that way, I eventually became a shut-in. The lack of human interaction eventually drove me down. I felt depressed and tired all the time. I could barely find the energy to go to class.
I started seeing a therapist. The first thing she asked was, of course, “Do you have any friends?” The answer was no. I’d never made any actual effort to talk to anyone. I spoke to the therapist at length and it always came back to attending events, meeting people and making friends.
That isn’t easy when you’re a shy person. The thought of approaching people used to keep me awake at night.
But over the summer, something just clicked. I’m not sure if I broke out of the shell I’ve kept around myself for years, or if working customer service all summer made me feel more comfortable talking to strangers, but this year has been a lot easier in the friend department.
Nowadays, I go out when I want to go out. I don’t wait on others to ask me to accompany them. I prefer making the plans, that way I can go somewhere I feel comfortable. Why should you wait on others in life? In the end, you should do what you like.
When you do what you enjoy, you feel good, and in turn, look happy. That’s when people will approach you.
Getting to know new people turns out to be fun and a lot less scary the more you do it. Just remember to squeeze in a little homework here and there between your social gatherings.